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4 Things You Should Never Do on a First Date
First dates can be incredibly awkward and uncomfortable if not handled properly. The good news is that when they are handled properly, and with some social finesse, they can be tons of fun and a great new beginning to a spectacular new relationship.
By avoiding these common mistakes you can ensure that you not only enjoy your first date, but that you also get a chance to really know the hot guy or girl you showed up to meet in the first place!
Here are the top four things you should never do on a first date:
1) Don't grill your date: while it is a good idea to learn what you can about someone on a first date, it’s not time to pretend you’re doing the Spanish inquisition. Ease up on the question asking. Don't spend so much time bombarding him or her with so many questions that it feels like a job interview. By all means, feel free to ask some questions but try to keep things casual and fun. If you catch yourself asking a bunch of questions, take that as a cue to start sharing some thoughts about who you are and what you enjoy in life (this way you don’t fall into the trap of playing interviewer…which isn’t fun for either of you).
Also, for women in terms of question asking: Don’t try to figure out how much money the guy makes or what he owns on a first date. Even though you think guys can’t figure out what you’re doing, the most successful guys are reading you like a book…and yes, it’s a HUGE turn-off for them. Start thinking about what’s important to you in terms of character and personality…focus on that first. Its way sexier and will get you further in terms of lasting relationship happiness.
2) Negativity: Save the drama for your mama. No one wants to hear about anything negative on the first date…that’s a sure way to make sure no one has any fun. Stay positive in all conversations and keep your personal worries and concerns for later on in the relationship…Or else you risk seeming like an overly negative person. People instinctively want to be happy in life so are rarely drawn to negative Nellie’s. Negativity on a first date will only ensure that there isn’t a second date.
3) Baby talk: Ladies: this one is for you. Newsflash: no one wants to have your baby or marry you before they even know if they like you. If you’re still talking about marriage and babies as “things you want” on a first date, you need to stop doing that before you sabotage your chances at these things completely.
Just take this advice: Men don’t want to marry you and they don’t want to have your baby until THEY KNOW YOU. Take the first date (in fact, take the first few months) to let them get to know you before you start talking about permanent decisions like babies and marriage…it might seem harsh but if you really want these things you need to know how to get them…and that means saving these conversations for later when he’s already deeply interested in potentially sharing these things with you. Talk of these things on the first date will not get you them…it comes across as very self-centered and men are looking to be nurtured, they’re not looking to be used as baby makers. You have to give love to get it.
4) Don't spend too much time bragging about yourself: while selling yourself to your date is an important part of getting a second date, there’s no need to showboat your way through. This one is especially for men…often when you sit around bragging about yourself women start to think to themselves “wow, he’s really insecure otherwise he wouldn’t need to so heavily overcompensate by bragging the way he’s doing.” See? Bragging on the first date can actually have a boomerang effect. Confidence is great…but everyone knows that true confidence is humble.
Use these tips and more to have more successful first dates. You’ll notice an immediate difference in your love life and can thank us later!
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